robotfvckers:

rae-napier:

petermorwood:

unbossed:

boonbucks-city-beach:

crows-cats-and-cackles:

grossrabbit:

grossrabbit:

fucked up how cooking and baking from scratch is viewed as a luxury…..like baking a loaf of bread or whatever is seen as something that only people with money/time can do. I’m not sure why capitalism decided to sell us the idea that we can’t make our own damn food bc it’s a special expensive thing that’s exclusive to wealthy retirees but it’s stupid as hell and it makes me angry

bread takes like max 4 ingredients counting water and sure it takes a couple hours but 80% of that is just waiting around while it does the thing and you can do other things while it’s rising/baking

plus im not gonna say baking cured my depression bc it didn’t but man is it hard to feel down when you’re eating slices of fresh bread you just made yourself. feels like everything’s gonna be a little more ok than you thought. it’s good.

bread is amazing and it’s also been sold to us as something really hard to make? Every time I tell someone I made a loaf of bread I get reactions like “you made it yourself???” and “do you have a bread machine then?”
I haven’t touched a bread machine in probably 10 years.
You CAN make your own bread, folks, and it’s actually pretty cheap to do so. I believe the most expensive thing I needed for it was the jar of yeast. It was about $6 at the grocery store and lasted me MONTHS (just keep it in the fridge.) The packets are even cheaper.
destroy capitalism. bake your own bread.

You can also make your own yeast by making a sourdough starter, so that cuts cost even more.

But you have to feed the starter daily/weekly and that means it grows quickly, but there are tons of recipes online for what to do with your excess starter. Cookies, pretzels, crackers, pancakes, waffles, you name it!!

Here’s a link to The Home Baking Association’s site. It has recipes and tips.

Make it even easier – “No-Knead Bread”. All YOU do is mix the ingredients together and wait until it’s time to heat the oven. The yeast does all the rest.

Here’s @dduane​’s first take on it and the finished product. We’ve made even more photogenic batches since.

Kneading is easy as well; either let your machine do it, or if you don’t want to or don’t have one, get hands-on. It’s like mixing two colours of Plasticine to make a third. Flatten, stretch, fold, half-turn, repeat – it takes about 10 minutes – until the gloopy conglomeration of flour, yeast, salt and water that clings to your hands at the beginning, becomes a compact ball that doesn’t stick to things and feels silky-smooth.

Here’s what before and after look like.

My Mum used to say that if you were feeling out of sorts with someone, it was good to
make bread because you could transfer your annoyance into kneading the
dough REALLY WELL, and both you and the bread would be better for it.

Then you put it into a bowl, cover it with cling-film and let it rise until it doubles in size, turn it out and “knock it back” (more kneading, until it’s getting back to the size it started, this means there won’t be huge “is something living in here?” holes in the bread), put it into your loaf-tin or whatever – we’ve used a regular oblong tin, a rectangular Pullman tin with a lid, a small glass casserole, an earthenware chicken roaster…

You can even use a clean terracotta flowerpot.

Let the dough rise again until it’s high enough to look like an unbaked but otherwise real loaf, then pop it in the preheated oven. On average we give ours 180°C / 355°F for 45-50 minutes. YM (and oven) MV.

Here’s some of our bread…

Here’s our default bread recipe – it takes about 3-4 hours from flour jar to cutting board depending on climate (warmer is faster) most of which is rise time and baking; hands-on mixing, kneading and knocking-back is about 20 minutes, tops, and less if using a mixer.

Here ( or indeed any of the other pics) is the finished product. This one was given an egg-wash to make it look glossy and keep the poppy-seeds in place; mostly we don’t bother with that or the slash down the middle, but all the extras were intentional as a “ready for my close-up” glamour shot.

I think any shop would be happy to have something this good-looking on their shelf.

We’re happy to have it on our table.

Even if your first attempts don’t work out quite as well as you hope, you can always make something like this…

can we have more posts like this in future please? this is really useful and could help those who are struggling

You can also make beer bread, which is SUPER easy and requires no rise period OR kneading!

Best part is you can add toppings/fillings. The one on the left has cheese and jalapenos in it.

The recipe is here!

ginger-ale-official:

mysticmoonhigh:

ginger-ale-official:

andsoimuse:

take a breath, spit out the blood in your mouth, and get back up on your feet. you still got a couple of motherfuckers to prove wrong.

Me getting up from the chair at the dentist after a quadruple root canal

Your response has nothing to do with ginger ale

and your response doesn’t have anything to do with being the biggest clown on the block but here we are again

vampireapologist:

cyanideending:

cyanideending:

relevantlyrambling:

northisnotup:

vampireapologist:

admittedly I don’t normally like modern shakespeare adaptations but once I went to see my cousin in a midsummer night’s dream and it opened with a high schooler saying “I don’t wanna read this play” so he sits down and eats an entire chipotle burrito on stage and then immediately falls asleep and the play begins but instead of the forest the faeries all hang out in a rainforest cafe TM and at one point in the middle of a scene the guy from the beginning just slowly drifts across the back of the stage on a skateboard, staring at all the characters as the events of the play transpire in the form of some sort of chipotle-induced coma lucid dream

THAT is EXACTLY what Shakespeare would have wanted

I swear if this isn’t floating around on the internet I’m gonna cry

Oh buddy IT’S ABOUT TO BE. I am like, 98% sure this was my high school’s production and I’ve got photos and video clips like craaaazy…

Here are some fun additions… the Mechanicals were also based on the characters of The Breakfast Club (here I am below, eating an actual Captain Crunch and Pixie Stix sandwich on stage.)

…and the one on the longboard was actually our Puck – he rode it through the whole play in the background. Please note his “Forest Cafe” shirt… which we also had logos for on the cups.

…and we had both a flash mob at the end AND an interlude where myself and one of the other Fairies danced to “Sexy and I Know It” while we were cleaning up the tables at the cafe.

I will post more of this later. I have a DVD at my house and will endure cringing at myself to bring you some quality clips… there’s probably one of K eating the burrito before the start of the play, too.

@hullaballoons Here is more Ktown Lore for you 

@cupcakelirry 

Here ya go kids… all 2h20m. if you make it through the whole thing once, that’s probably more times than any of the cast watched this DVD. You can probably see why. Tbh if you watch this, I am sorry in advance.

Important notes:

– Chipotle burrito makes a cameo about 30 min in,

– the end has a flash mob and a “commercial” for the Forest Cafe, 

– unfortunately, the lunch scene where all the mechanicals whistle like the Breakfast Club got mostly cut for some reason?

–

@vampireapologist in case you have any interest in reliving this… at the very least you can prove to any doubters that there was, in fact, a Chipotle burrito onstage.

https://player.vimeo.com/video/254265090?title=0&byline=0&portrait=0

I cannot even fully conceptualize, much less put into words, how wild this chain of events has been.

I have dozens of posts going around that have broken 50,000 notes, and plenty that have broken 100,000.

On every single one of these posts, there are hundreds, if not thousands, of comments and tags calling me a liar and the story fake, but none so much as this post.

This post was my most doubted of all.

And you came in………

with a Two and a Half Hour Long video.

I’ll never forget this.

We have a bond forged in fire and spirit now.

kramergate:

brieflyshadywolf:

kramergate:

beetledrink:

this is a great question because it narrowed my soul! i would choke on regular chewing gum on the steps outside before even entering the factory. willy would make no attempt to perform the heimlich maneuver and would leave my corpse on the concrete

this ask tapped into an extremely primal part of everyone’s body soul & mind

What sort of monster do you think Wonka is he makes chocolate for children for god sakes

did we watch the same fucking movie

letmeletmetrashyourlove:

I rewatched Captain America: Civil War last night and when Peter and Steve are talking during the airport fight scene, Peter says 

“He also said I should go for your legs” and he kinda chuckles 

and the only thing I could think of was that Peter saw that vine “How did you take down Captain America?” and the guy responds in a Russian accent, “We shot him in the legs because his shield is the size of a dinner plate and he’s an idiot”

aivopaahdin:

such-justice-wow:

tooiconic:

striders:

literally every skin and hair care professional in the world: hot showers are really damaging!!!

me, stepping out of the shower into a bathroom filled floor to ceiling with steam, my skin glowing neon pink after i’ve scrubbed every inch of my body raw under boiling water: Interesting!

This is a call out.

Both are good!

Fucking finally! Some good news for us hot shower lovers!

winterwombat:

absolutelyapsalus:

everybodyilovedies:

raphaeliscoolbutrude:

writing-prompt-s:

“In a game with no consequences, why are you still playing the ‘Good’ side?”

Because being mean makes me feel bad.

23 fucking hundred years of philosophy and this mother fucker on tumblr gets it in a meme

same thing applies to video games

Not all power fantasies are about having the power to hurt or control others without consequences. Nothing makes me feel more powerful than being strong or skilled enough to save everyone, fighting for a happy ending even when it seems impossible and pulling it off anyways. That’s the kind of power I wish I had more of irl, and any game or show that gives me a taste of it will probably have me hooked.  

just-shower-thoughts:

If aliens landed on earth today half of us would think it’s an April fools joke and the other half would think it’s the second coming.