It’s the year 2030. They’re making a Harry Potter remake, not a modern adaptation but set in the original era. And it’s fucking indulgent in 90s nostalgia. Someone’s got a butterfly clip, Ron is wearing a choker, there’s muggles playing with pogs, Spice Girls is playing in the background. Voldemort is wearing a crop top.
It’s simultaneously the worst and fucking best thing you’ve ever seen.
Incidentally, if you are fishing any stream or river in the Mississippi river watershed and catch any fuckers that look like this;
DO NOT THROW THEM BACK FOR FUCK’S SAKE.
That’s an Asian Carp, and they ARE invasive. The Iowa DNR encourages people to catch, kill, and eat as many as possible.
They’re also tasty as hell, even though they’ve got lots of bones.
Also, yes, this fish has weird eyes that are set real low and look downwards.
It does not have two eyes on the same side; it just has a mark there that looks sorta like one.
Another pic;
They mostly eat plants, but sometimes will get snagged when line fishing. But, they also do THIS;
Midwesterners being who we are, we immediately knew what to do; BOWFISH THEM SHITS
And INVENT THE SPORT KNOWN AS ‘SCARPING’, which is just netting them out of the air/smacking them with baseball bats/spearing them with pitchforks/ect while waterskiing;
See…I’m good with a bow…but not that good. I AM however much better with a net and having the prey come to me.
…Does anyone want to take me to go Scarping?
You can also use a shotgun
The DNR actively encourages all inventive ways of killing them off that people can come up with. There’s no limit on them, so you can fill up the boat.
And they’re DANGED tasty. Nice mild firm white flesh.
Only in American might you go shooting fish off the back of a moving boat.
Hahahaha holy shit!!! I have never been more proud to be an American!! 😀
imagine thinking nail polish is a gendered thing. unnecessary shiny adornment has no gender, if anything it’s more crow than human
Nail polish itself isn’t gendered, but most people who work with their hands for a living don’t want to spend money so flippantly on an ornament, that’s going to be destroyed by the work being done.
You’re not wrong about nail polish not being gendered, but most careers in said trades are usually dominated by men, unopposed.
Imagine thinking that there’s no issue with an unbalanced workforce
You plan on signing up for a craftsmen trade?
Howmany women do you se becoming plumbers? Electricians? Framers? Masonaries?
You don’t. Because it’s not a sold easy job, it’s serious work that almost no one wants to do.
I’m not say I take no issues with an unbalanced workforce, it’s that no one takes issue with an unbalanced work force.
When was the last time you say a push for more women in septic tank repair?
Hey guys this just in, women aren’t interested in
Serious Manly Work
they prefer the
Easy Feminine Jobs
Non-binary people prefer not to work at all and just drift through reality avoiding all jobs
CAN CONFIRM
Fun fact: my dad actively tried to push me to become a Plummer (he was a bricky and mason by trade) because he said there was shit ton of money for women in those types of male dominated trades. After all no woman home alone really wants a random guy to come into their house and do repairs.
Now I chose not to persue that, not to keep my nail polish clean but because I’m a more academic than practical person…
My little sister however, has just started her own ‘handyman’ business and is making a killing because my dad was right and all of her customers are women who don’t want a scary guy in the house. She has Plummed in bathrooms, refit kitchens, torn down walls, replastered buildings, and yes…unclogged pipes.
She also has the fanciest nails I’ve ever seen.
So much love for your sister!
It reminds me oh the lady who started a mechanic shop where all the mechanics were ladies. And they had a nail salon inside so that the ladies had stuff to do while they waited.
if i wasn’t non-binary and drifting through reality i would absolutely become a plumber
I’m a barista, I work with my hands. nail polish lasts exactly one day, if I’m lucky
u know who else works with their hands? nurses. daycare workers, teachers. anyone who washes their hands a lot: waitresses, cooks, dishwashers, bartenders. almost all medical-related positions, including veterinarians, which is statistically a female dominated field
what a Coincidence that the only professions u mentioned, mr. man, are manly male dominated man-jobs
I will be participating on a guacamole contest tomorrow at work. My objective is not to win, but to make every single one of the judges cry.
I will add every single chili I am able to find at the store, all of them.
All the chilis I could find at the store… i wonder if it will be enough 😛
Ready for the judges!!
So updates after the contest! I didn’t win.
This guacamole had the talent that when you take the first bite of your chip it isnt that spicy, but after a few seconds the feeling starts to spread. The judges bravely took a bite and were all happy and as I walked away from the table they started to gasp when the full force of the 6 different types of chili hit them at once.
People were free to taste it afterwards and every face of first surprise and then pain filled my heart with happiness.
I have never seen so much people enjoy suffering tho, because they finished everything so fast I even got time to make a second batch before the winners were announced.
Overall this was great and I had lots of fun making others suffer 😀
Borne Ceaseless 