mrbenwyatt:

ghostcongregation:

all bugs can be organized into one of three categories: homies, chillers, and haters. hornets and wasps are haters. mosquitos are haters. most spiders are homies cuz they eat shitty bugs, some spiders are chillers cuz they dont really do anything, but also some spiders are haters because they’ll kill you. learn to tell the difference. bees are homies but they become haters if you fuck with them. most beetles are chillers but if they’re the kind of beetle that flies really fast at your face then they’re haters.

image

heaven-nor-hell:

bogleech:

beatrice-otter:

thenutofroyalty:

jonsasnow:

kibumsfreakk:

im-so-3008:

Hey. LIVING COSTS MONEY! How about giving more money to the companies that employ me and MAYBE I MIGHT BE OK

This is such a funny thing to me because in Thai culture, it’s completely normal to live with your parents when you’re an adult. In fact, most people live in their family home until they’re married ¯_(ツ)_/¯

Saaaame in Pakistan dude and being abroad for grad school is really fucking me up I am not built to be even slightly independent 😂

In Western culture (including America!) it was completely normal for people to live with their parents in adulthood–sometimes until they married, sometimes longer.  In America, that changed (for men) in the 1940s and 50s, when it was really really easy for an 18 year old to get a good job that paid more than enough to live a comfortable life on, or to afford college which would then practically guarantee you an even better-paying job.  Women joined the trend of moving out at 18 in the 1960s and 70s.

And now those jobs don’t exist, or are few and far between, and guess what!  People are living with their parents again.  But that 70-year span was just long enough that it fell out of common memory, and now people are seen as “failures” because the economics have changed.

A very great deal of Western culture, ESPECIALLY America, is actually still based on a memory of the 40′s and 50′s as the baseline of normalcy despite them being a total fluke at the time.

World War II and McCarthyism created a massive shift towards rabid patriotism, Christian fundamentalism and the ideal of the “nuclear family” that resembled nothing before it and we’re still recovering from as the majority of our most powerful politicians are old enough that this period of sudden fanaticism is their “nostalgic good old days” and the way they think things are “supposed to be.”

I love when these posts randomly become tiny history lessons, it soothes me

jellyfishdirigible:

mckitterick:

sweaterkittensahoy:

bogleech:

asafruca:

yelnatszeroni:

frogmp3:

buckakke:

john mulaney talking about how much he loves his wife and roasting other male comedians that just talk shit on their wives is why The Gays like him so much because he’s what Straight Culture should be

he literally called her a bitch so let’s raise the standards ladies and gentlemen

the bar is at the earth’s core 

literally fuck you to hell tumblr

This is the first I heard of this guy and I think this is the most dramatically I’ve seen anyone’s words taken out of context in quite a while

John Mulaney’s entire thing about his wife (and when she was his girlfriend) is about undoing the toxic horseshit that male comedians have done in talking shit about their wives for so fucking long. When he first mentions her, he says about his Jewish girlfriend “this is gonna get playfully antisemitic,” except it doesn’t [note: I am not Jewish, and I am aware that shades my perceptions]. He talks about how she’s forthright and helps him be better at standing up for himself because he’s really fucking bad at confrontation and she is very good at pointing out that he shouldn’t have to wait an hour for food at a restaurant or be stranded at an airport. The parts of her nature that would be derided for being “so Jewish” by other comedians are some of the reasons John loves her. She doesn’t take shit, and he realizes that he doesn’t have to. 

When he mentions her in the latest special, he mentions the conversation quoted above before he dives in. HE IS AWARE HOW LOW THE BAR IS. And what are his stories? There’s no nagging wife. There’s no stories of her not getting how manly he is. The jokes are about what a fucking dork he is and how her responses are in line with WHAT A FUCKING DORK HE IS. He ADORES her because she doesn’t give a fuck, and he is aware he gives entirely too many fucks. 

And when he finally DOES tell a story about her messing something up, it’s a hilarious misunderstanding about the Last Supper that John finds fucking hilarious because he was raised Catholic, so the Last Supper is a BIG DEAL, and she’s Jewish, so it wasn’t on her radar. The story is hilarious because it’s about a very cute and funny misunderstanding based on different backgrounds. It’s not about “finally” one-upping that bitch he married. It’s about being DELIGHTED to find out that bitch he likes so much has a fucking hilarious take on the Last Supper. 

Bring me WAY MORE male comedians like John Mulaney, and this bitch will be happy.

Plus, if you compare his recent versus early shows, you can watch him come to awareness about the toxic masculinity inherent in old-school standup and grow as a comedian into someone much funnier at the same time. Kudos.